Token

So much has within the past month concerning me at the high school. I started back with my PR job, which is not the highlight of my career, but the job was given to me and I had no choice. I ain't when jobs become labors. I admit, I don't do the job well at all. I mean I do it half-ass. Seriously I do. I do the publication part great. Putting the news letter together and all that is like butter--easy on and off. But the other parts of the job just plain suck for me. So I took matters into my own hands and quit. Yep put in my letter of resignation and called it a d.a.y! I was so proud of myself for actually shutting my mouth and doing something positive. Besides the extra pay I get is well compensated with my night gig at the college. In fact what I make at the college is 50% more than the PR job! Now I can focus on my duties as a teacher..whew!

On the other front, as the only person of any color at the high school, I am often asked to do things just because of my color. I know it sounds so racist and it is but see it's the truth. Often times I put the black bia down on them but this time I was so taken back that it nodded like a good girl. One of my admins came to me and asked me to be on an interview panel of teachers for the school. We are going through an accreditation process as a school and the team that performs the evaluation interviews a group of teachers. Yep I was chosen because I was the colored girl of the school! Good ole token is what I have become. See I know most people would be disgusted at my terminology, understandably. But know I don't walk into the term willingly. It is a reality of my situation. Do I love my job, umm heck yeah!! No other place I would rather be at the moment. But the reality is the school needs to do more. Now do I bring this to their attention, you better believe it. It is horrible that a school with a growing population of black, hispanic, asian & other ethic students does not have a growing population of teachers that represent their student body. So please know I raise my black glove high as can be everyday!!

It is amazing how this subject lends itself to other parts of my like as well. Take for example I was at church, yes church, and one of the ladies asked me to participate in a Black History activity. I told her no. She got mad. I was really joking and being a smartass in my normal sarcastic manner. I guess she didn't take it that way. She told me--you of all people should want to be a part. You got locs and miss natural hair and all. See now she had my attention, what does my hair have to do with ANY of this conversation?? My hair is a style choice--(I'll save the hair philosophy for another post). I just bit my tongue and walked away. Wow the logic and thought process of people can be scary! Yeah I got natural hair and I love my black people, but the two don't necessarily have any correlation or cause and effect relationship. If I had a perm, like her, I would still love my black people. So because I have locs I should love more or show more??? Damn stop doing me and worrying about me and do YOU well!!!