Thursday, June 25, 2009

I'm Backkkkkkkk!!!

Yes, after a week of recovery I'm back. 100%. Thank God for docs & medicine! I'm not one of those who look toward "natural" healing. Hey, docs have a purpose on this earth and I am going to make sure they fulfill it! And that's what I got insurance for. I still have no clue how I got sick. Maybe it was a bad sinus infection, (that's my self diagnosis!) who knows. But I'm all good now. No more infection!

So I can't believe June is over. and I have only read one book. I am sooo disappointed with myself. This is not a good summer. I have yet to write for pleasure. My poor book is being abused. At this point I don't even know if I will get to it. I am still working on the district newsletter. I should meet my deadline on that with no problem.

The book....I read Sapphire's PUSH. I read it in a day. It was short. Definitately had my attention with its creativity and approach but it lacked in the substance to me. The storyline is absolutely powerful but I felt there could have been more depth to it. I finished the book asking a lot of questions that were not answered in the novel.

The others....I picked up a book of prayers, which I try to read two a day. I really like this book. I also have The Alchemist by Coelho and some other book that I found on the clearance shelf at Barnes & Noble. Hey, it's by a black guy and it was 4.98...had to give it a shot. Some of my favs have been on the clearance shelve.

By the way, Barnes & Noble is like heaven for a nerd like me! When I pull into the parking lot I can feel my heart begin to race. I wanna take all of the books home with me, I mean ALL the books! I never walk out of the place with more than one book. And this visit I bought four! But back to the original....feeling better, need to get back on track with summer goals, relationship with Old Flame is going's good to be back!

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

I'm Sick

Ain't this crazy?? The weather gets nice and I get sick. It hit me all of a sudden on Sunday, itchy throat, ear ache, and some itchy eyes. I thought it was just my allergies or sinuses so I just chilled out. But Sunday I didn't even get out the bed! Called the doc on Monday got in that morning and guess a viral infection in my throat and ear. It hurts like hell! I'm so so tired, so tired! LOL So I might be out for the count for a few days. Been drinking vitamin water, surprisingly its really good! I guess Black Mamba (Kobe) and The Chosen One (Lebron) know what they talking about....

Sunday, June 14, 2009

It's A Family Affair

My weekend was quite eventful. On Saturday my family and I attended a family picnic. Not just my immediate family, I'm talking about my whole family. All the decedents of my great-grandfather and his siblings. It turned out to be really nice. So many people showed up most I had never even meet before. All in all I enjoyed myself. In the back of my mind I keep thinking about Old Flame. He's coming in town on Monday. And to make matters more interesting, everyone who knows about me and him keep asking about when he was coming in and all the other details.

I was reluctant to spill the beans, but it all just came running out like water! As I spoke I couldn't believe how I was so excited about him. I thought I had these emotions and feelings all under control, but in retrospect I could see I am really falling for this man! I have never felt this in my life about anyone. Even the men I thought I loved! LOL My feelings amaze when me! I guess it's not until you begin to express yourself in spoken word and hear your own voice that you realize what you have on the inside.

Oh I almost forgot the good stuff!!! So at the park with the fam, one of my cousins who I hadn't seen in a long time gave me the sadididdy...yeah you know the one who thinks she has it all in control and is soooo much better than you!!! Now keep in mind I know her and her husband very well. But he had to refer to him by "my husband" not by his name. And "my husband" is management so I don't have to work, I'm a stay-at-home mom....blah blah blah. I so wanted to say "bitch do I look like I care???" Seriously do you but you in no way gotta be nasty about it! I hate that attitude! She has always been this way toward me. I'm starting to think she has a little jealousy running in her veins! Family---gotta lov'em!

Monday, June 8, 2009

Bland Weekend

So was it me or was the game yesterday one of the most boring game you ever seen in your life? Of course I would have loved to be court side, but I would have been pissed to be there last night. I do commend the Orlando Magic for fighting hard last night instead of a blow out like game one. But come on! Is this going to be a four game final? I need some excitement . . . in this series that is.

On the other end I could use some excitement in my life. For the last few nights I have been bored. I know it's strange I can honestly say it's been an extremely long time since I have been bored, but last night and the night before I was bored. I was in a silly mood wanting to laugh and be funny but I didn't want to be around my usual crowd of weekend parties. I guess it's the summer blues before I gotta get some work down. I gotta start working on the summer newsletter for the school this week, so I wont have time to be bored now.

I did some painting over the weekend. It turned out better than I expected. I have more paint and would love to paint my sister's room but i gotta prime first. I hate priming. I really hate painting because using a roller makes my hands rough. I know that is such a girly statement but it is true. I loath rough skin of any kind, especially on the hands. Anyway that is so far from the point.

I went to church Sunday and realized I lost something over the last few months. My desire, drive, and determination has been slowly fading. I gotta find it and the only way to renew it is to get my to fortifying my relationship with God.

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Maxin' and Relaxin'

So even though I am done for the summer, teaching that is, I still have the responsibility of working on our school district's quarterly newsletter. I started getting the information together while school was still in session, but there is still more work to do. And in my usual fashion, I am putting it off! Yes I have NO energy to go back to the school to get things done so that I can start putting the newsletter together. I want to relax for a minute. At this point I really don't wanna do any work at all. I don't wanna edit a story, read about the fees for the upcoming school year, change the dates, etc. I just wanna max and relax!!!

In other news, Old Flame and I have been talking on the regular. The more I talk to him the more I can see our future connecting. Yet I don't wanna think to much on the issue because I want my feelings to be genuine and true not contrived and planned. Last week he told me he loved me. I responded, "I know." According to my girl J Luv, that was the wrong response!! I didn't feel like I could say it back, yet. I mean I do love him a lot, but I don't wanna get caught in emotions and dreams. But I really do know he loves me. He tells me and his actions tell me as well. I'm sure one day I will tell him....

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Lack of Judgment???

Old Flame and I have been really working on renewing our relationship and thus far its been going good. I am really discovering why I loved him then which makes he love him even more now. On the flip side I am faced with some of the same issues we dealt with then now. All the big relationship issues I'm cool with, for example, trust, honesty, loyalty, etc. But I really wonder if he is ready for a relationship. I don't want him selling me big dreams. sure it all sounds good, don't just be a talker, be a walker. I'm at a point in my life were I'm ready to settle down and enjoy one man in my life. I enjoy playing at the moment, but pimpin aint easy, ya heard! It's so hard to explain my feelings because I they are everywhere at the moment! Which is so not me. I'm trying to pull back find my focus and make sure my emotions aren't making the decisions for me.....